Not too long ago, women who were involved in the gaming community were a minority. We fought against stereotypical archetypes: busty warrior amazons and mousy mage scholars. We often ended up being the girl who made sure the tabletop gaming group met on time and ensured that there were snacks provided and did anybody want anything to drink? Slowly we have carved a niche for ourselves and proved, through the sweat of running games, development of well-played and complex characters and writing that contains depth and personality that we are here to stay.

Overcoming stereotypes has not been the only obstacle placed in our path. We have risen in a world dominated by male game masters and storytellers, male players and views of a world that sometimes seems as alien to us as Klingons. Somehow we continue to endure and grow, eking out a niche in every genre, game, tabletop and even coveted male roles. Still, no matter how many times we win a sword match, solve the game or write the piece de resistance we still must face the fact that unlike our male counterparts we have yet another obstacle, and that is being a woman.

Moon phases, childbirth, and child-rearing are problems that compound the stresses of daily life and make what we try to do and accomplish more difficult. Yet we keep these problems and concerns to ourselves and continue. We are trained from birth not to make a fuss and strive forward and in the case of gaming this is even more important. No one wants to hear that we have cramps or aren't feeling our best because of the onset of our flow, and players certainly don't want to hear that one of the floor GMs is lying down with a cloth on her head and a hot water bottle on her stomach because she feels like she is being stabbed in the stomach. Nor do they want to hear that an integral part of the game wasn't written because a female writer or GM had to change diapers, make dinner, do the laundry, see the kids out the door or pick them up at soccer practice.

Along those same lines: GMs are thinking of the game, the plot, the players and their enjoyment. A few GM's may think of what or how to provide for the couple or the single woman with a child; many are at a loss for what to do or how to provide coverage or even insurance. And it usually lies with the wife or mother to make the arrangements for the game, find a sitter, find and pack the costuming, and not be too tired to even enjoy the game.

Sure, our male counterparts have problems; I'm not denying this nor making light of them, just making a statement. When I started live role-playing there weren't many strong parts for a woman in the genre I chose to play in. Try as I might, over the several years that I played I constantly ran into barriers while trying to create and expand my character because of the 'men' that ran the game. When I tried to write a game within that genre, I wanted to feature women. As I went to cast the five female roles in that game I found that I was casting most of the women within our campaign - and we weren't a small community. My writing met with red ink and harsh commentary and finally it was decided that a man should be my co-GM rather than give me help in a re-write or any direction. I considered myself a strong woman, but this crushed me. I continued with this campaign for several more years, before I gave up and moved on, but those harsh feelings and self-doubt stayed with me.

Years later, I returned to the gaming community - albeit a different one - much wiser and more determined. I was on a mission this time. I had stories bubbling out of my head and eager to be enacted. I found several theater style games and a few campaigns to play in, played my first tabletop and, best of all, had someone to listen to my ideas. Someone who was more interested in encouraging and building upon my ideas than shooting them down. I consider myself lucky to have found such a mentor. A man who was use to working with people and, more importantly, writing and running games with his own wife. He gave me a different outlook on working with men and writing games again.

When I finally ran the first game of the campaign we were working on I was wrung out at the end, unable to believe that I had pulled off my part, that the game was successful and that the players enjoyed themselves. I slept for almost fourteen hours straight and was on a creative high for a week. What I learned was that hell, yes, I was a woman, but I was also a damn good gamer, player, writer and a GM. I might have more to think about when scheduling a game such as the time of the month or when the kids need to see the dentist, but it was worth it and that is why I keep coming back.

My point in telling you this is that if I did this, you can too. Maybe, you won't do it in the same way or manner as I did, but it is possible to make a difference. Too often, women aren't allowed to step forward or don't feel that it is their place to do so, but you can step forward even if you have to find a new community or even a new genre. If you are a player, a writer, storyteller or GM this is your place just as much as it is the tabletop geek's - who has been playing for 20 plus years, or the men still running around in the field hitting each other with sticks.

I don't usually rant about my womanhood, nor am I really strong on my femininity, but I felt that this topic was something important to me to say and for other women in the LARP community to hear. You don't have to step forward and take on leadership roles, but you can make a start by standing up for yourself. I'm a very reasonable person, but I have strong feelings about this, and I wanted to set them down and get them across. Women are getting louder and stronger and our voices are being heard. We've come a long way, have further to go, but together we can go wherever we want.